According to science, the paper will probably get you a papercut

After a thorough investigation into the matter, three researchers from the Technical University of Denmark believe they have identified which types of paper are most likely to cause the dreaded paper cut. But instead of simply warning the public, the trio of physicists embraced the dark knowledge to create a single-use weapon capable of slicing up vegetables, fruits, and even some meat.

It doesn’t take a huge logical leap to assume that as long as there has been paper, paper has also been cut back. Aside from the searing pain, one of the biggest annoyances about the millennia-old injury is its suddenness. In most cases, a victim doesn’t expect a razor-sharp incision to sting when rummaging through everyday materials. But which types of paper should you handle most carefully? This is evident from a study published in the August issue of the journal Physical assessment Eit comes down to a combination of material, thinness and physics.

According to one August 27 announcementSif Fink Arnbjerg-Nielsen, Matthew Biviano and Kaare Jensen relied on ballistic gelatin as a substitute for a living subject – the recognizable, rubbery material often used to simulate human and animal skin while simultaneously exploring the potential harm from hazardous environments and weapons to assess. After assessing multiple types of pulpwood and the different approaches, the team finally settled on a few key characteristics that are reflected in the perfect paper cut.

First, there is a clear “Goldilocks zone” when it comes to the width of a paper. If the material is too thin, such as tissue paper, it will bend under pressure. However, thicker note cards and photo paper will not cut the surface much. But the closer a paper is to 65 microns in width, the better suited it is to cuts. That scary measurement is most often seen in examples such as sheets of newsprint or dot matrix printer paper (think old-fashioned typewriter or fax paper). Fortunately for the fingers, both variants are no longer as common as they once were – the former unfortunately due to the unfortunate state of print media, while the latter has largely been replaced by inkjet paper.

[Related: Why do paper cuts hurt so much?]

Of course, that does not mean that society is safe from paper savings. As anyone who works in an office knows, those inkjet reems are still perfectly capable of ruining your morning. Meanwhile, both magazines and Post-It notes are also still thin enough to cause damage.

However, material is not the only factor in cutting potential. The physicists also found that an oblique motion, like a knife or sword, is most likely to result in cuts rather than a straight approach to a target. And in order to put all this new knowledge to use, researchers then decided to show how effective the perfect paper can be when cutting. After combining a 3D-printed scalpel handle with a small piece of dot matrix printer paper, the group set up their tool, called “Papermachete,” to use. According to Scientific newsthe single-use paper machete knife was able to cut plenty of cucumbers, apples, peppers, and even chicken. However, there is (probably) no reason to fear such an invention; the team claims that future iterations could actually deliver a new kind of eco-friendly, disposable and cheap utility item.