Allison Holker reflects on season 18 of ‘SYTYCD’ on Finale Party

Allison Holker could feel the presence of her dead husband, Stephen “tWitch” bosswhile serving as a judge on season 18 of So you think you can dance.

“I just feel like every day, – [on the] show and not [on the] show — I just feel like he’s putting wings on my back,” Holker, 36, shared exclusively We weekly on Wednesday, May 22. “I just feel so much support from him, and I’m very grateful for that, because I think some people might see that kind of energy and be a little scared of it. But it is so beautiful and I feel like it protects me day in and day out.”

Holker said Us that returns SYTYCD as a judge for season 18, it felt “like a full circle moment” for her.

“I feel like this show is the gift that keeps on giving. It seems to reach me and find me in moments I didn’t even know I needed. It found me when I was 18 years old. I was still in high school. I had bad eyebrows,” she said. “It gave me love, it gave me opportunity, it gave me career, it gave me friendships and it gave me children, so the show has just been everything to me. And even now that he became a judge, it did the same thing. It hit me at a time when I was really scared to go back to work.”

Holker added that the experience made her feel like she was honoring Boss, who as SYTYCD judge during seasons 15 and 17.

“Every time I was on the show, I saw the other dancers [and] When I heard people’s stories, I just knew I was where I needed to be in honor of myself and my personal journey, but also his journey and his personal journey and the journey that brought us together,” she said. “I feel like this is the space I’m supposed to be in and I know he’s with me every day.”

Holker then threw a season 18 finale party at Jax’s Studio City Anthony Curley was crowned the winner on Monday, May 20.

“Antonius is great. Stephen would have absolutely loved Anthony,” she said Us.

Keep scrolling to see exclusive photos from Holker’s SYTYCD season 18 finale party: